wouldn't it make more sence, if the person you were dating; you didn't like anymore to just break it off? l don't get it at all... to stay in a dead relationship, or for whatever reason ( revenge, lonely, etc) There are other reasons why people do this. But it doesn't change the fact. Its the most hurtful thing you can do. At least have the guts to be honest and tell the person you don't want to be with them, or it isn't working. Its so stupid to just go sleep with someone else, and expect your spouse not to find out.It has happened to me and it stings. A lot.
To me those people are scum. Lairs, and dirt.

actually it's pretty difficult to get a divorce. There's legal fees, etc. Plus, some just want an affair and keep their lives. Men especially cheat even when they still "love" their wife (to some extent), but are just scumbags.

Oh man I'm sorry to hear that. There are many reasons why people cheat. And I don't believe any one of them would give them the right to do so.

It's a LOVE STORY, baby, just say YES!

what a life...

What I found was that spouses that cheat tend to be maybe "bored" or you know, want a little bit of excitement in their life. The spouse usually doesn't want to get a divorce but maybe something like cheating, or maybe the adrenaline associated with the fact that you can be caught any minute might be mentally addicting? I'm not 100% sure but my psychology teacher kinda went off topic and talked about it for a little while. He said its got to do with "excitement", but he was kind of a crazy guy. It's a wrong thing to do never the less though.

People do it for various reasons, but these reasons don't justify the act as being the right thing to do. I mean i can see ppl doing it because they're bored, want excitement, are not getting enough attention from the spouse, revenge. Humans are flawed beings, and seeing as how every individual is different along with their circumstances, you never really know what could be an overall motive that could pertain to EVERYONE. no generalizations can really be made on this topic.

Psychologically speaking, Zeroregrets is right. You may find it stupid and senseless, but if sleeping with someone outside the marriage were morally accepted, I'd bet there would be less people cheating. I'm not justifying it, I agree that it is completely immoral, I'm just answering the question "why". Because everything new is exciting and something new and hazardous? It's just added excitement. As Paulo Coehlo wrote in The Zahir, "I love you but I slept with someone else out of boredom". They actually may like and appreciate the family that you built together, but they just don't have the willpower to fight it. Biologically, we are set up to look for the best sexual partner, and that's our concept of beauty. Of course, there's always someone who is better than the actual one. The key is to not fall into temptation. I read a psychologist who wrote: "There's nothing wrong about thinking that someone is hot or beautiful. What is important is how you react to it". Let's say that some people are stronger than others (For anyone who wonders if I'm the cheating kind, I'm completely single and I haven't had a partner for two years, so it doesn't apply to me ^_^ )

(10-10-2009 06:38 AM)Kahn Wrote:  Because everything new is exciting and something new and hazardous? It's just added excitement.
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Of course, there's always someone who is better than the actual one. The key is to not fall into temptation. I read a psychologist who wrote: "There's nothing wrong about thinking that someone is hot or beautiful. What is important is how you react to it". Let's say that some people are stronger than others

I agree with Kahn. Sometimes it's just the allure of sin that appeals to them. It's like how some kids steal or do drugs; they don't really mean it, they just want something exciting.

However, that doesn't mean it's right.