would you want to know if your partner had an extensive sexual history?

[viewfinderlife]

I've personally had issues over my own past and became hesitant to tell a partner honestly if they asked and have lied to avoid my own embarassment. I have been honest with only a handful of women, a few of whom walked out immediately, a few got quiet and contemplative, and one didn't seem to mind. Keep in mind, I'm not boastful of it, it was a bad time in my life and soon quit sleeping around and got engaged. Since the engagement was broken off and she died, I'm very scared of having to tell another girl.

So I ask you (men and women), would you want to know if your partner had been around the block waaaaaaay more than you have? If so, what makes you want to know? How would it make you feel? Would you take the time to understand why the person had so many (insecurity etc)?

Just looking for opinions. Lets assume you wouldn't run into one of their many partners or if you did they were discrete enough to not mention anything ever happening.

[aquamizu]

honestly for myself...i probably wouldn't want to know...i mean why? so i can constantly think " i wonder if i live up to all the other partners?"....what's important is how he is with me now...just my opinion..

[Pandasaur]

I may be interested and curious about their past relationships just because I would like to know more about the person and I would be understanding about it. I'm sure there are many understanding people who are willing to look past your past. Like what aquamizu said, important thing is that the person is now with you.

[ah_wong201]

i wouldn't mind or ask. if she wants to tell me then i'll listen. the only thing to make sure if she is clean or not.

[asr_tdg]

Experience is good, right?

The important thing is that they're with you now and that they're clean. Otherwise, I wouldn't mind knowing or not knowing.

I do have to say though, if my partner had a lot of partners in the past, I would stop and ask myself why that was the case. Does my partner have commitment issues?

[vnbabe]

It really depends on where you are in the relationship.... if you both feel committed to one another and trust each other why not? If it doesnt hurt the relationship and make you guys grow from your pasts then go for it. Girls will always be curious about thier boyfriend's past and girls will stick with you if you treat them good. Trust and honesty are what it has to take to make it work no matter what. Sexual histories, bad histories etc etc =)

As for me, i am very understanding to these kinds of situations. I may be a bit jealous but if i love my boyfriend and i know that he loves me, then his past will not be a bother. It will only become an issue if his past lovers keep popping up.
But I am the kind of person to "get to know you" before I date you so I will have some sort of knowledge of what I am getting myself into. Connect, date and get to know each other, then become exclusive and have your serious talk. Shouldnt be too bad if you follow these steps. Never never connect and then have your serious talk xD
Time will heal hardships so you should take it easy -- nice and slow

*goodluck with everything monsieur

[Kahn]

To tell the truth, I couldn't care less. And if you ask, I am a virgin
Either way, I would check for Sexual Transmission Illnesses for both, you and your partner. (I am doing it at some point when I get the time)