I love my girlfriend, but I want to be single

[takeshi]

I don't know what to do. I love my girlfriend, but I don't like the restrictions that are being placed upon me by being in a relationship. I consider myself to be someone who has morals, but I am attracted to other girls and I like partying and hanging out with my guy friends. I feel like I'm trapped, but I still really love my girl, and I am afraid if I did break up I would regret it severely.

What do you think I should do?

[fake_innocent]

Like I've mentioned before, you should have just stayed single the whole time. I did tell you that you're those type of guys that isn't ready to commit to one relationship in serious mode seeing you're always looking at other girls. You should tell your girlfriend how you feel.

[WinterFrost]

(10-25-2009 06:57 AM)fake_innocent Wrote:  Like I've mentioned before, you should have just stayed single the whole time. I did tell you that you're those type of guys that isn't ready to commit to one relationship in serious mode seeing you're always looking at other girls. You should tell your girlfriend how you feel.

I don't think its helpful to tell him what he "should have" done, because it's too late for that. We need to look at the future.

Tell her that you can't commit to a serious relationship and what does she think about it. Don't say anything about breaking up, but say you don't think you're ready for being serious with her and gauge her reaction first. If she seems ok with it, then break up, if not, then you'll need to reconsider another alternative.

[fake_innocent]

That's basically saying "I am breaking up with you."

"I'm not ready for a serious relationship right now" is a nicer way to say it, but it still says the same thing as breaking up. Even if she is not okay about it, he won't be okay seeing he is having doubt if he wants to continue with a committed relationship. I mean either way if he ends it, he's going to hurt her feeling, but sometimes it better to say the truth even if it means you have to be the bad guy.

I can relate to this seeing I had that type of relationship in the past. He loved me, but wasn't ready for committed relationship. He broke my heart, but look on the bright side. I've dealt with it and have moved on.

[chunman81]

how old are you?

[asr_tdg]

(10-25-2009 05:46 AM)takeshi Wrote:  I love my girlfriend, but I don't like the restrictions that are being placed upon me by being in a relationship. I consider myself to be someone who has morals, but I am attracted to other girls.

Part of the reason one is in a relationship is because they love their significant other. Just because you're attracted to other girls doesn't mean you want to date them. Unless of course, you do... which means you've got a problem.

(10-25-2009 05:46 AM)takeshi Wrote:  I like partying and hanging out with my guy friends. I feel like I'm trapped, but I still really love my girl.

You don't have to be out of a relationship in order to hang out iwth your friends, so I'm not sure how that's a problem.

(10-25-2009 09:20 AM)fake_innocent Wrote:  That's basically saying "I am breaking up with you."

"I'm not ready for a serious relationship right now" is a nicer way to say it, but it still says the same thing as breaking up. Even if she is not okay about it, he won't be okay seeing he is having doubt if he wants to continue with a committed relationship. I mean either way if he ends it, he's going to hurt her feeling, but sometimes it better to say the truth even if it means you have to be the bad guy.

I can relate to this seeing I had that type of relationship in the past. He loved me, but wasn't ready for committed relationship. He broke my heart, but look on the bright side. I've dealt with it and have moved on.

I have to agree with her on this one. Either you love her enough t stay, or you don't. I think she'd rather that you mean it and break it off if you really feel uncomfortable with her than be cheating on her behind her back.

[takeshi]

Oh I mentioned the partying thing because she doesn't like it when I go out and party, especially not with her. So I basically stopped going out except in very rare occasions.

Also I've kinda been neglecting my guy friends because she wants to be with me 24/7, so it's caused me to not hang out with my guy friends as much.

[fake_innocent]

If that is really what is bothering you...tell her straight out how you feel.

[asr_tdg]

(10-26-2009 02:08 PM)takeshi Wrote:  Oh I mentioned the partying thing because she doesn't like it when I go out and party, especially not with her. So I basically stopped going out except in very rare occasions.

Also I've kinda been neglecting my guy friends because she wants to be with me 24/7, so it's caused me to not hang out with my guy friends as much.

Sounds like she's a little clingy, if anything else... which may be part of the reason why you feel like you need to leave the relationship. Perhaps try to just sit down and let her know that while you love her, it's important that you have enough room to breathe and just chill with friends.

[edison]

Yep she sounds very dependent on you. That can reduce your time hanging out with friends. I would just end it.

I'm pretty sure when he's looking at other girls, he most likely look at them at a sexual kind of way lol...I know what you mean though. I might sound like an asshole but I'm honest. When I'm dating a girl, I always look at different girls because...that's just me. I hate being tied down to one person when I'm so young so I want to enjoy life. If that's how you feel takeshi, then by all means, end it with her.